In a public Facebook thread, I dared to say ‘Happy Gurpurab’ to the Sikh community this week. I was then told to ‘wake up,’ ‘lay off the pipe,’ ‘go live in India,’ and ‘put a sock in it Nancy pants,” among other insults.
Is the light in us gone? Has the soul in us grown so dark that if we celebrate the blessings of one, it diminishes the blessings of others? If someone says, “happy birthday” to a friend, but it is not your birthday, is it ok to rebuke all the people who extended their best wishes?
What if instead of happy birthdays, we extend greetings like, Happy Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Solstice, Holi, Vesak, Gurpurab, Ramadan, Matsuri, Christmas and – not to be glib, or maybe to be glib – happy hump day, how, in the name of whatever spiritual tradition you follow, is that offensive?
At the heart of every religious and spiritual tradition we know of, Compassion is the core principle. It means to ‘see’ that we all ‘suffer together.’ The ache in me recognizes the ache in you. The disappointments I’ve had in my life acknowledge that you’ve had disappointments too. Why we find it necessary to inflict more pain on our neighbours is not a mystery to me, it’s a testimony of the spiritual work we have yet to do.
The struggles we have in our lives – the suffering – are not more or less than your neighbours; they may be different, but it does not mean the weight carried is any less taxing or should not be validated.
My challenge to each of us: let’s make the daily grind a little easier to bear – smile at a stranger, buy extra groceries for the community food pantry, tip the cashier, call a friend, let go of old grudges… we know what we can do.
All this goes beyond common courtesy to the realms of kindness and ‘service’. It is intentional: when our heart, mind and actions knowingly work together for a specific purpose.
Words matter. Actions matter. You matter. Happy Gurpurab to my Sikh community.
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Love Nancy